30 Days of Kink: Day 17

What misconception about kinky people would you most like to clear up?

I think a lot of people believe that if someone is into BDSM or has a fetish then they must have had a horrible childhood that was chock full of all kinds of abuse. People who work in the sex industry are stereotyped that way too. I don’t normally have much problem with stereotypes, but I think this one is especially unfair due to the severity and extremely personal nature of the assumption being made. Other groups get stereotyped, but usually the generalization being made is cultural or racial, and deals with the group as a whole and not the individual. And they generally don’t involve actions that would get someone put in prison. When someone stereotypes a kinky individual or a sex worker as being a product of abuse, they’re making an assumption about a very, very personal thing. I dislike the “pedophile priest” stereotype for similar reasons. The subject matter is just far too serious to generalize in the way that many people do.

The fact of the matter is, not everyone who is into kink or makes a living from sex is a victim of abuse, just like not every priest likes to diddle little boys. These kinds of generalizations only serve to make one group feel superior to another, which in turn makes them feel justified in passing judgment on others without getting to know them.

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